If I'm Being Honest
dodie Lyrics

I was told this is where I would start loving myself
Someone told me that I could begin to accept and love myself at this point in my life.

Flirting's delicious, proved to be beneficial for mental health
Engaging in playful, romantic behavior with others can be enjoyable and even have positive effects on mental well-being.

All of my best bits pulled forward, collected, displayed
I'm putting my best qualities on display, showing you what I have to offer.

Sadly, I just think that I was disgusting today
However, even when I present myself in the best possible light, I still feel ashamed and unhappy with myself at times.

You blew me up like a big balloon far too soon
You boosted my confidence to an extreme level too quickly, making me feel uneasy and unprepared.

I'm left a stuttering teen
I feel insecure and unsure of myself, like a teenager struggling to find the right words to say.

How did I get here?
I'm surprised and overwhelmed by how quickly things escalated between us.

It's all so quick, and I feel sick
The speed at which our relationship is moving makes me uncomfortable and nauseous.

Red pushing down on the green
The intensity of my emotions is overwhelming me, making it hard to stay grounded and balanced.

Could you love this?
Are you capable of loving me, given all my flaws and insecurities?

Will this one be right?
Could we be the right match for each other, or is this just another failed relationship?

Well, if I'm being honest
To be truthful and transparent with you,

I'm hoping it might
I'm cautiously optimistic that this could work out between us.

Did you plan to fall?
Did you intentionally set out to develop feelings for me, or did it just happen naturally?

Oh, I bet it's not that at all
I suspect that your feelings for me are not as deep or genuine as you claim them to be.

Hope has a cost, keeping all fingers crossed and held tight
Holding onto hope comes with a price; it requires a lot of effort and energy to maintain.

But I look idiotic with my limbs all knotted, it don't feel right
At times, my attempts to feel hopeful and positive about our relationship make me feel foolish and uncomfortable.

Truly you've shaken me, and I think you like how I plead
You've had a profound impact on me, and I suspect that you enjoy having power over me.

But I have a hunch that that's all you wanted from me
However, I also suspect that your interest in me is purely superficial and self-serving.

Holding my breath makes me choke
I feel suffocated and constricted by the pressure to make this relationship work.

I'm used to being a joke
I've been ridiculed and rejected in the past, and I'm accustomed to not being taken seriously.

All, all, all, all
All of my thoughts and emotions are consumed by this relationship, and I can't seem to escape it.

If I'm being honest
To speak candidly and sincerely,

Well, if I'm being honest
To tell you the truth,

Oh, I bet it's not that at all
I suspect that the reality of our relationship is not what you claim it to be.