Samurai
EAV (Erste Allgemeine Verunsicherung) Lyrics

If you wanna see a Nackedei, you fly to Thailand.
If you want to see a naked person, you should go to Thailand.

Madame Butterfly makes you high, für Kilo oder zwei, oh.
Taking drugs such as Madame Butterfly can make you feel high, especially if you take a few grams.

Herr Meier fährt I'm Urlaub nur nach Bangkok oder Singapur.
Mr. Meier only goes on vacation to places like Bangkok or Singapore.

Doch nicht wegen Landschaft, wegen weiblicher Bekanntschaft.
However, he doesn't do it for the landscapes, but rather the women he can meet there.

Zuhause ist Herr Meier eine graue Maus.
Mr. Meier is a very plain and unremarkable person when he is at home.

I'm goldenen Dreieck läßt er Sau heraus.
But when he's in the Golden Triangle (an area known for opium production and drug trafficking), he acts more wild and free.

Eine Lotusblüte, wunderzart und fein
He meets a woman who is delicate and beautiful like a lotus flower.

Von allerbester Güte, lädt Herrn Meier ein.
She invites Mr. Meier to spend time with her.

Mister Meier, bitte sei mein Samurai.
The woman asks Mr. Meier to be her protector and warrior.

Zahlst do mi cash, hupf I aus der Wäsch
If you pay her in cash, she'll do whatever you want.

So schiach kannst gar net sein!
She doesn't care how unattractive Mr. Meier may be.

Herr Meier find in Thailand nur Essen nicht sehr leiwand.
Mr. Meier doesn't enjoy the food in Thailand very much.

Mag Curry nicht und Sojakeim, mag Wiener Schnitzel wie daheim.
He doesn't like curry or soybeans, and prefers Wiener Schnitzel (a traditional Austrian dish) like he eats at home.

So eine Massage liebt Herr Meier sehr
However, he does enjoy getting massages.

Und für bessere Gage kriegt er noch etwas mehr.
And for a better price, he can get some extra services from the masseuse.

Ja, I'm Land des Lächelns sind die Frauen klein
In the Land of Smiles (Thailand), the women are often smaller in stature.

Er beginnt zu hecheln, könnt seine Tochter sein!
Mr. Meier becomes attracted to a woman who could be his own daughter.

Daheim ist Meier sehr verklemmt, doch hier kauft er sich Seidenhemd.
At home, Mr. Meier is very conservative, but here in Thailand he buys silk shirts to wear.

Am Strande von Papaya, da schwellen ihm die Adern.
At the beach in Papaya, he becomes very excited.

Herr Meier fliegt nun gleich weg, der Urlaub, der ist aus.
Mr. Meier is leaving soon because his vacation is over.

Vom goldenen Dreieck bringt er was mit nach Haus.
But he brings something back with him from the Golden Triangle.

Er spürt ein Zwickizwacki unterm Kimono
He feels a strange sensation under his kimono.

Was ist denn dort am Sacki? Lausi - oho!
He discovers he has lice in his groin area.