Nika Roza Danilova was raised in Merrill, Wisconsin, on over 100 acres of forest. Danilova started singing early on, buying voice lesson tapes and opera sheet music at the age of 7; soon she began working with a vocal coach. It was not her parents' idea: "I begged them to do it. For some reason, I really wanted to sing opera even though I wasn't really exposed to it as a kid. I think my little baby toddler mind heard some opera song and then became fixated on how powerful it sounded," she later remembered. Danilova started performing opera when she was 10 years old, but experienced serious psychological difficulties. "I would too often lose my voice before performances due to anxiety, and was so hard on myself. I would beat myself up about any imperfections or flaws in my voice. I was such a perfectionist, and my voice was still so young so it couldn't do everything I wanted it to, and I resented myself for that. But since performing as Zola Jesus it's been getting easier," she later recalled.
In her teens, Danilova started to experiment in a more rock-orientated format. By naming her alter ego after Jesus Christ and the French writer Émile Zola she said she consciously wanted to alienate peers. "It worked perfectly – a lot of people wouldn't even say Zola Jesus because they thought it was sacrilegious", she said in an interview. "Using Jesus in my name isn't necessarily supposed to be a strong statement. I respect religion and I know people do need it, but it's a weird phenomenon in our world. It's so weird," she later commented. Inspired by favorites like Ian Curtis, Lydia Lunch, Diamanda Galás, Throbbing Gristle and Swans (but also bubblegum pop and classical aria), she started to record at home, using keyboards, drum machines and "anything else she had on hand". In 2008 she debuted with singles "Poor Sons" on Die Stasi and "Soeur Sewer" on Sacred Bones Records.
In 2009, while still studying at the University of Wisconsin-Madison, Zola Jesus recorded (in her apartment) and released her debut full-length album The Spoils. The sound was in a certain way dependent on her surroundings. "I usually record in the winter because I am holed up. It's cold outside but warm inside with the heater and blankets. A lot of the songs are cold but in the coldness you find warmth. Winter has a lot to do with it.
Zola Jesus released an EP titled Stridulum in 2010, described as her most melodic work to date. Inspired by the Giulio Paradisi 1979 film of the same name, it marked "a huge leap forward in terms of fidelity and accessibility." After the release Zola Jesus performed at the SXSW festival, for her second time. Her second full-length album Stridulum II, which was an extension of the EP regarded as a debut in the UK, received 8/10 from NME which praised Danilova's classically trained voice as "the deadliest weapon in her arsenal" and called the album a "dark masterpiece."
Zola Jesus' third full-length Conatus was released in late September 2011 via Sacred Bones. The album's 11 tracks were produced by Brian Foote (aka Nudge; Jackie-O Motherfucker, Cloudland Canyon) and Danilova herself, including elements of cello, double bass, violin, and viola.
Zola Jesus has played with Former Ghosts and toured in support of Fever Ray and The xx. She also provides guest vocals on "New France" from their 2012 album Wonky.
Sea Talk
Zola Jesus Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
When you tell me not to cry
Did you understand I can't help it
Did you understand I don't have a choice
Do you wanna go
Do you really know
I don't ever stay awake for you
Do you really know
That I can't afford the truth
Sick
I'm sick honey
I don't, I don't got the money
Do you want a rain-check
'Cause I can't give you what you need
All by myself
Do you wanna go
Do you really know
I don't ever stay awake for you
Do you wanna go
Do you really know
That I can't afford the truth
Give me one more try
Before I fall apart, fall into the sky
I feel every inch, I feel it fold
Over myself, over you
Do you wanna go
Do you really know
I don't ever stay awake for you
Do you wanna go
Do you really know
That I can't afford the truth
I am bored
"Sea Talk" by Zola Jesus is a hauntingly beautiful song that explores themes of emotional vulnerability, honesty, and the cost of love. The opening lines suggest that the singer is on the verge of tears and struggling to control their emotions. They question whether others truly understand the power of their feelings and the lack of control they have over them. This may be directed at a love interest or a friend who cannot comprehend the depth of their emotions.
The chorus repeats the phrase "Do you wanna go, Do you really know" as if the singer is testing the other person's commitment to them. They acknowledge that they are unable to stay awake for them, perhaps indicating that they have become exhausted and depleted from constantly trying to please or maintain the relationship. The line "I can’t afford the truth" suggests that the singer is hiding something, possibly their emotional state or their inability to provide the other person with what they need.
The third verse speaks of feeling sick and without money, hinting at a sense of hopelessness and despair. The singer acknowledges that they cannot give their love interest what they need and asks if they want a rain-check, indicating a desire to postpone or cancel the relationship altogether. The final lines of the song suggest a sense of resignation and acceptance, as the singer asks for one more chance before they fall apart and lose themselves completely.
Overall, "Sea Talk" is a powerful and deeply emotional song that speaks to the human struggle to connect with others and be honest about our vulnerabilities.
Line by Line Meaning
Way up high
From a distant and elevated perspective
When you tell me not to cry
When you advise me not to shed tears
Did you understand I can't help it
Are you aware that I have no control over it
Did you understand I don't have a choice
Did you understand that I have no say in the matter
Do you wanna go
Do you wish to depart
Do you really know
Are you completely certain
I don't ever stay awake for you
I never make the effort to stay up for you
That I can't afford the truth
That I am unable to handle the truth
Sick
Ill or unwell
I'm sick honey
I am feeling physically or mentally unwell, my dear
I don't, I don't got the money
I lack the monetary funds
Do you want a rain-check
Do you wish to postpone our plans
'Cause I can't give you what you need
Because I am unable to provide you with what you require
All by myself
Alone or without assistance
Give me one more try
Grant me another opportunity
Before I fall apart, fall into the sky
Before I lose control, before I am consumed by chaos
I feel every inch, I feel it fold
I experience every part, I feel it collapsing or bending
Over myself, over you
Regarding myself and yourself
That I can't afford the truth
That I am unable to handle the truth
Do you wanna go
Do you wish to depart
Do you really know
Are you completely certain
I don't ever stay awake for you
I never make the effort to stay up for you
That I can't afford the truth
That I am unable to handle the truth
I am bored
I am feeling uninterested or unengaged
Lyrics © TERRORBIRD PUBLISHING LLC
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind
Gabriel Salazar
Discovered this song thru Netflix’s The Bubble. Amazing song 🔥🔥🔥😵💫🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻
Emmet Wilson
Me to hahaha.. the guy who took the cocaine then took the heart attack lol
Gabriel Salazar
@Emmet Wilson That part had me dying 🤣🤣😭😭😭 but yeah, this song hits way too hard for the scene it was used in 🙌🏻🙌🏻🔥🔥🔥
Emmet Wilson
@Gabriel Salazar I kept rewinding it lol then recorded it and sent it to me mate lol had me in tears lol.. yeah the song is absolutely brilliant love it
Gabriel Salazar
@Emmet Wilson I love when music creates these genuine interactions. Many many blessings for you & your loved ones my friend 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻
Emmet Wilson
@Gabriel Salazar sure do.. same to you 🥰
anna zaman
Thanks to the movie The bubble for this song. Never heard of it before and am loving it
JT Corpse
Just discovered Zola Jesus a week ago and can't get enough.
Richard Goold
Look up her song wiseblood
Mark Lehmann
Thanks to someone special I just discovered this song. It goes straight into my bones.
thank you for being here