With 2016’s Wishlist EP – recorded to tape at the apartment of band mate Ty Ueda – Lina proved an ability to craft simple, introspective and succinct songs, each one a pulsing glow leaving you both hollow and whole, alone but never lonely. It is on Lina’s debut album Won that we reap the full rewards of this newfound confidence in expression and rejection of internal hesitation. “The writing doesn’t necessarily get easier, but I feel more comfortable tapping into emotions and going to those places that need to be written about. Won, as it turned out, is the product that I have been hearing and picturing in my head as I write and listen to music.” It is the product of what happens when you push past the fear of what it means to think out loud – to become accountable for your internal struggles by way of manifesting your ideas into songs that are then free to grow apart from you, to exist on their own while always remaining specifically implicative of you. Now backed by a full band, each track manages to remain piercingly intimate, sometimes brief, and always honest, while gaining a wholly new sense of gestation both sonically and lyrically.
“I am all the wiser now that I accept my fate”.
It’s clear throughout that Lina’s awareness of their internal shift is folded into every corner of these songs. The move towards working with a full band, the deliberate force with which their often quaveringly raw vocals are delivered, and the lyrics themselves are all constantly functioning to process and take stock of an updated self. Which is not to say this is an album of concise reflections or black-and-white conclusions. The darkly punctuated “Summer Sleeper” rolls in with one of the more concrete claims Lina presents us with. "On letting go: it's only as good as you want it to be, only as bad as you make it." This is an album insistent on the consideration of perspective above all else.
The album art, a reference to the historical practice of photographing ectoplasm expulsion, acts as a visual representation of the internal changes and newly gained perspectives precipitated by the writing and recording of this debut album. “Writing this record was a lot of looking inward at myself with close eyes. Figuring out what I had to get rid of and what I had to keep. I like the idea of an ectoplasm being something you’re expelling. That you’re getting rid of because it shouldn’t be inside you anymore.”
And at a certain point, growth is not just a process of replacing old selves with new, but often simply an act of expansion. Won in many ways continues to dig through Lina’s preoccupation with the search for home. It’s a deceptively loaded search sewn gracefully into the haunting and sparse track “Face Off." Whatever "home" means - a relationship, a physical space, a mentality, or an emotion - that’s up to the listener. As Lina puts it, “It’s a record for me, but it’s also for everyone else. I don’t claim to be totally emotionally stable, or smart in relationships, or always very conscientious of others, but this record is me reaching out and trying and maybe sometimes I lose but sometimes I win.”
Free Cell
Lina tullgren Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
staring into
my golden dreams
staring backwards
and in between
somebody wants you around
a pick up game to make me proud
another line and i’ll steal it now
standing outside of the show
i play cards it’s what i do
golden silence dissolve
someone new but wait don’t call
SAIDDONE
when you coming over
will you tell me about
things you’ve been listening to
what it all means to you
i will tell a joke
about being free
reading when i can focus
starts with the letters abc
abc
i can see
i can see
just one more fight and i will make myself go home this time around
golden silicon
it isn’t in my head
notes covering my walls
hot in the morning i am leaning
into no one again
i should not be allowed
to love anything this much
guess i gotta learn sometime
sometime it’s right now
sometimes it’s next week
sometime october
when it’s all said and done
when it’s all said and done
The song "Free Cell" by Lina Tullgren captures a sense of introspection and longing for connection. The opening lines, "staring into my golden dreams, staring backwards and in between," suggest a contemplative state, where the singer is reflecting on their desires and experiences.
The repeated phrases, "somebody wants you around, a pick-up game to make me proud," and "another line and I'll steal it now," hint at the singer's desire for validation and their willingness to go to any lengths to achieve it. They seek the attention and approval of others, potentially through their artistic pursuits, symbolized by playing cards - an activity that requires strategy and skill.
The lyrics "when you coming over, will you tell me about things you've been listening to, what it all means to you" reveal a longing for a deeper connection with someone, where they can share their musical interests and the deeper meanings they find in it. The singer wants to engage in meaningful conversation and learn from others.
The line "I will tell a joke about being free" suggests a self-deprecating humor, perhaps as a coping mechanism to mask a feeling of being trapped or constrained. This is followed by the mention of reading, but needing to focus, symbolized by the letters ABC, which further highlights a struggle to concentrate or find direction.
The lyrics continue to express a feeling of longing and vulnerability, as the singer mentions "just one more fight and I will make myself go home this time around." This line suggests a pattern of seeking conflict or drama, which may be a defense mechanism to delay confronting their own emotions or facing difficult decisions.
The references to "golden silicon" and "notes covering my walls" evoke a sense of isolation and being surrounded by reminders of the past. The line "I should not be allowed to love anything this much" could indicate a fear of vulnerability or getting hurt, yet the singer acknowledges their need to learn and grow through their experiences.
Overall, Lina Tullgren's "Free Cell" is a introspective song that delves into themes of longing for connection, self-discovery, and the push and pull between seeking validation and finding personal fulfillment.
Line by Line Meaning
staring into
Intently observing
my golden dreams
My aspirations and desires
staring backwards
Reflecting on the past
and in between
And the moments in between
somebody wants you around
Someone desires your presence
a pick up game to make me proud
An opportunity to impress and satisfy myself
another line and i’ll steal it now
Taking advantage of another opportunity
standing outside of the show
Being on the sidelines
i play cards it’s what i do
Engaging in my usual activities
golden silence dissolve
The tranquility fades away
someone new but wait don’t call
Encountering a new person, but hesitant to reach out
when you coming over
When will you visit me
will you tell me about
Share with me
things you’ve been listening to
The music you've been listening to
what it all means to you
Its significance to you
i will tell a joke
I'll share a humorous story
about being free
Related to the concept of freedom
reading when i can focus
Reading when my concentration permits
starts with the letters abc
Begins with the alphabet sequence
i can see
I comprehend
just one more fight and i will make myself go home this time around
After one final conflict, I'll force myself to leave now
golden silicon
Valuable substance
it isn’t in my head
It does not exist solely in my mind
notes covering my walls
Messages and reminders displayed prominently
hot in the morning i am leaning
Feeling passionate and inclined in the morning
into no one again
Towards no specific person once more
i should not be allowed
I mustn't be permitted
to love anything this much
To feel such intense affection
guess i gotta learn sometime
I suppose I must learn eventually
sometime it’s right now
Sometimes the present is the right time
sometimes it’s next week
On occasion, it's in the following week
sometime october
Possibly in October
when it’s all said and done
After everything is finished
Lyrics © SC PUBLISHING DBA SECRETLY CANADIAN PUB.
Written by: Lina Tullgren
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind