With 2016’s Wishlist EP – recorded to tape at the apartment of band mate Ty Ueda – Lina proved an ability to craft simple, introspective and succinct songs, each one a pulsing glow leaving you both hollow and whole, alone but never lonely. It is on Lina’s debut album Won that we reap the full rewards of this newfound confidence in expression and rejection of internal hesitation. “The writing doesn’t necessarily get easier, but I feel more comfortable tapping into emotions and going to those places that need to be written about. Won, as it turned out, is the product that I have been hearing and picturing in my head as I write and listen to music.” It is the product of what happens when you push past the fear of what it means to think out loud – to become accountable for your internal struggles by way of manifesting your ideas into songs that are then free to grow apart from you, to exist on their own while always remaining specifically implicative of you. Now backed by a full band, each track manages to remain piercingly intimate, sometimes brief, and always honest, while gaining a wholly new sense of gestation both sonically and lyrically.
“I am all the wiser now that I accept my fate”.
It’s clear throughout that Lina’s awareness of their internal shift is folded into every corner of these songs. The move towards working with a full band, the deliberate force with which their often quaveringly raw vocals are delivered, and the lyrics themselves are all constantly functioning to process and take stock of an updated self. Which is not to say this is an album of concise reflections or black-and-white conclusions. The darkly punctuated “Summer Sleeper” rolls in with one of the more concrete claims Lina presents us with. "On letting go: it's only as good as you want it to be, only as bad as you make it." This is an album insistent on the consideration of perspective above all else.
The album art, a reference to the historical practice of photographing ectoplasm expulsion, acts as a visual representation of the internal changes and newly gained perspectives precipitated by the writing and recording of this debut album. “Writing this record was a lot of looking inward at myself with close eyes. Figuring out what I had to get rid of and what I had to keep. I like the idea of an ectoplasm being something you’re expelling. That you’re getting rid of because it shouldn’t be inside you anymore.”
And at a certain point, growth is not just a process of replacing old selves with new, but often simply an act of expansion. Won in many ways continues to dig through Lina’s preoccupation with the search for home. It’s a deceptively loaded search sewn gracefully into the haunting and sparse track “Face Off." Whatever "home" means - a relationship, a physical space, a mentality, or an emotion - that’s up to the listener. As Lina puts it, “It’s a record for me, but it’s also for everyone else. I don’t claim to be totally emotionally stable, or smart in relationships, or always very conscientious of others, but this record is me reaching out and trying and maybe sometimes I lose but sometimes I win.”
110717
Lina tullgren Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
Give it back
all the time you wasted
go back to bed
all the dreams that scared you
you were never really here
and i’ll stay on my phone where i am safe from thought
pay it back
what’s this time you’ve wasted
i’m down on my ankles
trying to make myself last
when you shut up and fall back asleep
what are you gonna do when there’s no one for you to hold onto
i am just some friend that you are too scared you might hold onto
johnny selfish
lies i’m falling
into nothing that can end like scripture
will you shut up and fall back asleep
touching something doesn’t mean that you mean that much to me
cause i am right here
but i’m fleeting
give me your ears in them i’m whispering
i know what i have to do
now that i am nothing new
hollow but sometimes whole
sand inside a fragile bowl
In "110717" by Lina Tullgren, the lyrics express a sense of frustration and disappointment towards someone who has wasted their time and missed opportunities. The singer addresses this person, telling them to "give it back" and return the time they wasted. They then suggest that this person should go back to bed and confront the dreams that scared them. The line, "you were never really here," implies that this person was not fully present in their own life.
The singer then shifts their attention to themselves, mentioning that they prefer to stay on their phone, where they feel safe from their thoughts. They acknowledge that things never happen the way they want them to. The singer asks this person to "pay it back" and take responsibility for the time they have wasted. They refer to themselves as being "down on [their] ankles," implying a sense of vulnerability as they try to make themselves last.
The lyrics then introduce the idea of the person falling back asleep and shutting up, suggesting that they use these defense mechanisms to avoid facing their problems. The singer questions what this person will do when there's no one left for them to hold onto, highlighting the fear of being alone. They also feel like just a friend whom this person is scared to hold onto, indicating a lack of emotional connection.
The lyrics then mention someone named "Johnny" who is described as selfish and a source of lies. The singer feels like they are falling into nothingness, comparing it to an ending like scripture. They again ask the person to fall back asleep and shut up, indicating a desire for them to stop avoiding or denying reality. The singer emphasizes that physical touch does not necessarily indicate deep emotional connection. They conclude by expressing their presence in the moment, yet also feeling transient and fleeting. They ask for the listener's attention, whispering to them, and acknowledge that they have a sense of purpose despite feeling hollow at times, comparing themselves to fragile sand inside a delicate bowl.
Line by Line Meaning
Give it back
Return the time that was wasted
all the time you wasted
The time that was wasted
go back to bed
Return to a state of comfort and sleep
all the dreams that scared you
The dreams that evoked fear
you were never really here
You were never fully present or engaged
and i’ll stay on my phone where i am safe from thought
I will continue to distract myself from deep thinking by staying on my phone
it never happens like the way i want
Things don't unfold according to my desires
pay it back
Repay the time that was wasted
what’s this time you’ve wasted
What is this time that has been wasted
i’m down on my ankles
I am in a vulnerable position
trying to make myself last
Attempting to prolong my existence or relevance
when you shut up and fall back asleep
When you stop talking and return to sleep
what are you gonna do when there’s no one for you to hold onto
What will you do when there is no one left for you to cling to
i am just some friend that you are too scared you might hold onto
I am merely a friend whom you fear to develop a deeper connection with
johnny selfish
Referring to someone named Johnny who is self-centered
lies i’m falling
I am succumbing to false or misleading statements
into nothing that can end like scripture
Descending into a void that has an unpredictable and final outcome
will you shut up and fall back asleep
Will you stop talking and return to sleep
touching something doesn’t mean that you mean that much to me
Physical contact does not necessarily indicate a significant emotional connection
cause i am right here
Because I am present and available
but i’m fleeting
However, I am transient or temporary
give me your ears in them i’m whispering
Listen closely to what I am softly saying
i know what i have to do
I am aware of my obligations or tasks
now that i am nothing new
Now that I am not unique or groundbreaking
hollow but sometimes whole
Empty or lacking substance, yet occasionally complete
sand inside a fragile bowl
Fine particles inside a delicate container
Lyrics © SC PUBLISHING DBA SECRETLY CANADIAN PUB.
Written by: Lina Tullgren
Lyrics Licensed & Provided by LyricFind