Intro
Sniper Lyrics


Instrumental


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Most interesting comments from YouTube:

Amarenamann

[A lone RV is driving down a desert road. Camera cuts to the dashboard, where a bobblehead of the former Civilian sits. A hand comes from offscreen and flicks the head.]
Sniper: "Boom. Headshot."

[Meet the Sniper text appears. Cuts to the Sniper driving his RV as Valve's edited version of Magnum Force plays in the background.]

Sniper: "Snipin's a good job, mate! [He pauses to make a right turn] It's challengin' work, outta doors. I guarantee you'll not go hungry-"

[Cuts to a shot of the Sniper brushing his teeth. There are three photographs on the right of his mirror of a BLU Engineer, Heavy, and Scout - the Engineer and the Scout are crossed off, but the Heavy is not.]

Sniper "-'cause at the end of the day, long as there's two people left on the planet, someone is gonna want someone dead."

[Scene cuts to view inside the Sniper's scope. The Sniper headshots the Heavy from the previous scene; the bullet shatters the Bottle of the Demoman behind him, causing the top half of the Bottle to embed itself in his remaining eye. The Demoman flails around, takes out his Grenade Launcher, fires three grenades wildly in the air and falls over a ledge, with his stray grenades igniting a cluster of explosive barrels below and causing a chain explosion.]

Sniper: "Ooh."

[Cuts to the Sniper talking on a pay phone.]

Sniper: "Dad? Dad, I'm a- Ye- Not a "crazed gunman", dad, I'm an assassin! ...Well, the difference bein' one is a job and the other's a mental sickness!"

[Back to Sniper in the RV.]

Sniper: "I'll be honest with ya: my parents do not care for it."

[Cuts to Sniper climbing the tall tower in Gold Rush Stage 3, Cap 1. The Sniper waits at the top of the tower for a shot.]

Sniper: [Glances away from his scope briefly to address the viewer] "I think his mate saw me."

[A bullet ricochets off the ledge under the Sniper.]

Sniper: "Yes, yes he did!"

[The Sniper takes cover as return fire ricochets off the tower.]

[Cuts to a time-lapse image of the Sniper waiting for a shot. Several jars of urine fill up to his side, as the Sniper drinks coffee and waits. As the sun starts to set, the Sniper smiles and finally takes his shot.]

[The Sniper backstabs a Spy through the chest with his Kukri on Gold Rush Stage 3, then slides him off the knife with a satisfied expression.]

Sniper: "Feelins'? Look mate, you know who has a lot of feelings?"

[Cut back to the RV]

Sniper: "Blokes that bludgeon their wife to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards."

[Sniper takes off his hat and puts it on his chest, standing over the dead Spy.]

Sniper: "Be polite."

[Sniper headshots a Medic, a Soldier, and a Pyro, blowing the last's head clean off.]

Sniper: "Be efficient."

[Slow-motion shot of the Sniper reloading his rifle.]

Sniper: "Have a plan to kill everyone you meet."

[The Sniper fires directly at the camera. The screen blacks out.]

[Team Fortress 2 ending flourish music plays.]

[Cut back to the pay phone.]

Sniper: "Dad.... Dad p-, yeah - put Mum on the phone!"



Pier

Even if i clearly wasn't one of its first players, since i got to firstly know it arond january of this year, i still really enjoy the game, the characters, the obscure stories told by the comics, the community, the humor, the memes.


Everything about this game is great

It's the first first person shooter i actually got to enjoy, without toxic communities and bad game design.

It's just really iconic as a game, and it's a shame, and a waste of ideas leaving it to die.

You, Valve , could just say nothing, not caring of it, or maybe it's just too expensive to re-build an already "dead" game that is from 2007

I just wish i could've know about it before the bot pandemic, right when valve cared about it, when we all enjoyed playing this game, without all the problems we have today, when it was all more simple.

Please Valve, take care of us.


Please Valve,

#SaveTf2



Spamton's Gaming Dumpster

0:01 Intro cutscene

[Snipers van on the road]

[Inside view of snipers bobber]

Sniper: Boom. Headshot.

0:11 Intro

[While sniper driving]

Sniper: Snipin's a good job mate.

Sniper: It's challenging work. Out of doors.

Sniper: I gurentee you won't go angry

[Scene cuts to sniper brushing his teeth looking at a picture of the Heavy]

Sniper: Cause at the end of the day, as long there are two people left on the planet, someone's gonna want someone dead.

[Scene cuts to Sniper headshoting Heavy and ends up hitting Demo's alcohol bottle and the shard hits demo's eye]

[Demo panics and fires a barrage of bombs then falls then sets of explosion]

[Sniper on the phone]

Sniper: Yeah, yeah I'm uh- I'm not a crazy gunman dad im an assasin.

Sniper: What a difference being one is a job and the other's mental sickness.

[Scene cuts to Sniper driving again]

Sniper: I'll be honest with ya, my parents do not care for it.

[Sniper climbs a tower]

Sniper: I think this mate saw me.

[Someone tries to shoot Sniper]

Sniper: Yes, yes he did.

[Timelapse of Sniper trying to snipe someone for hours]

[Sniper impales Spy with a machete]

Sniper: Feelins'? Look mate, you know who has a lot of feelings?

Sniper: Blokes that bludgeon their wife to death with a golf trophy. Professionals have standards.

[Snipers hat on chest]

Sniper: Be polite.

[Sniper shooting blue teams heads]

Sniper: Be efficient.

[Camera starts to move into Sniper's sniper barrel]

Sniper: Have a plan to kill everyone you meet.

[Sniper Shoots camera]

[Camera zooms out of Sniper in promotional art in tune of the music]

Sniper: Dad... Dad p-, yeah - put Mum on the phone!"



All comments from YouTube:

Matty Boy

Took me like 5 years to realize the irony that the sniper lives in a CAMPER. At least Valve recognises the position of the class.

ALJ 9000

(Rimshot)

Franco Rodriguez

Lmao nice observation

Guy Man

They also gave him a backpack in game called the cozy camper which rewards staying scoped in and out of combat with hp regen and less flinching when hit after staying scoped for long enough

Matty Boy

@Guy Man you would've thought I'd have realized that considering it's my go-to secondary

Yannkam 212

well...snipers don't run around like in videogames.

105 More Replies...

Pinocchio

Fun fact, the Sniper's quote "be polite, be efficient, have a plan to kill everyone you meet" is strikingly similar to something a US general said.

Callum Breton

The only part that was changed was the last part, the original was "be ready to kill everyone you meet"

Daniel Haire

"Be Polite. Be Professional. And always have a plan to kill everyone you meet." - Gen. Jim "Mad Dog" Mattis, USMC (Retired)

exitsandman

And the Fox News guy

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