B.V.S.
Steel Panther Lyrics

Big Vagina Syndrome is becoming a common disease
B.V.S. is a condition where women are hard to please in bed.

Ladies that have this affliction are never easy to please
Women with B.V.S. cannot be satisfied sexually.

If you poke someone with B.V.S. there's not much you can do
When a woman has B.V.S., it is difficult to satisfy her sexually.

It's like filling the Lincoln Tunnel with an Oscar Meyer wiener or two
Trying to please a woman with B.V.S. is like trying to fill a large space with something small.

I won't rest till I do my best to rid the whole world of B.V.S.
The singer is determined to help women overcome B.V.S.

Gonna do my best to rid the whole world of motherfucking B.V.S.
The singer has a strong desire to eradicate B.V.S. globally.

B.V.S. is a bit like shooting hoops with a tennis ball
Trying to satisfy a woman with B.V.S. is like using something that doesn't quite fit.

It's easy to get it in there, but it doesn't satisfy at all
Having sex with a woman with B.V.S. is not fulfilling.

Well I do my best to make 'em cum, but my cock won't do the trick
The singer tries his best to please women with B.V.S., but his penis is not enough.

And I got a full five inches
The singer's penis is five inches long.

In other words, a massive dick, yeah
The singer sarcastically refers to his penis as 'massive'.

B.B.S. is different
The singer talks about a condition called 'Big Breast Syndrome'.

That's when your tits get super fat
Big Breast Syndrome is when a woman's breasts become significantly larger.

But most guys that I talk to say they got no problem with that, no
The singer perceives that most men find Big Breast Syndrome attractive.

Sood man, Big Vagina Syndrome is not just a silly joke
The singer insists that B.V.S. is a serious problem.

It's a pandemic of massive proportions affecting every girl I poke
The singer expresses that B.V.S. is a widespread issue that affects all women with whom he has sex.

If a man like me can't make you cum with my massive piece of meat
The singer believes that if he, with his penis size, cannot satisfy a woman, then she may have B.V.S.

Chances are you got B.V.S. girl
The singer asserts that it is likely that a woman with whom he has sex has B.V.S.

And that's the thing that we gotta beat
The singer wants to overcome B.V.S. as a society.

Gotta beat that fuckin meat
The singer wants to overcome B.V.S. and make sex more fulfilling for both partners.

Whoa, ya got some kick ass breasts, but the problem is that goddamn B.V.S. B.V.S.
Even though a woman might have great breasts, it doesn't matter if she has B.V.S. because sexual satisfaction cannot be achieved.