Jackson
Cledus T. Judd Lyrics

Well, I start runnin' a fever
I get very angry

Every time he opens his mouth
Whenever she talks about Alan Jackson

She's been gawkin' at Jackson
She has been idolizing Alan Jackson

Ever since his first song came out
From the time he made his first appearance in the music industry

Oh, she loves Alan Jackson
She has a massive crush on Alan Jackson

And his pretty blonde hair
She's particularly fond of Alan Jackson's blonde hair color

Oh, I love Alan Jackson
He also admires Alan Jackson for the same reasons as her

I ain't got a prayer
He has no chance with her

Well, he tried dressin' like Jackson
He tried to dress like Alan Jackson

Belt buckles, boots, and a hat
He tried replicating Alan Jackson's signature style

She said, "Sorry hon, that won't help you none
She bluntly rejected his efforts

Because you're just too dang fat."
Due to his weight, he doesn't look as good as Alan Jackson in the same way clothes

Oh, I hate Alan Jackson
He hates Alan Jackson for making it difficult for him to advance his relationship with the girl he likes

She sleeps with a piece of his coat
She has a piece of Alan Jackson's coat which she keeps close to her

'Cause of them songs he wrote
She loves Alan Jackson primarily because of his music

Well, I went backstage at his concert
He went backstage at Alan Jackson's concert

I got on his bus somehow
He managed to sneak onto Alan Jackson's bus

That big talkin' man and his little five piece band
Alan Jackson and his five-member band

Just taught her what I didn't know how
Alan Jackson was able to impress the girl with his artistry in a way that the guy could not

Now I'm his openin' act
He is now Alan Jackson's opening act

She's never comin' back
Regardless of his efforts, the girl will not come back to him

Oh, I start runnin' a fever
He becomes angry at the thought of the girl being with Alan Jackson

Makes me want to cuss
He is so upset that he wants to swear

Oh, he hates Alan Jackson
He continues to harbor strong negative emotions towards the artist

Think I'll blow up his bus
He makes a threat against Alan Jackson and his bus

Yeah, Someday I'll Rock His Jukebox!
He swears that he will avenge his humiliation and embarass Alan Jackson

No You're not!
The assistant retorts back that he can't actually carry out his plans

Ha! Might hit him with a Tall, Tall, Tree!
He mentions his plan to use a tall tree against Alan Jackson

Well, he just might hit you back!
The assistant warns him that he will face retaliation from Alan Jackson

I'll show him The Real World!
He declares that he will give Alan Jackson a taste of reality

He'll think Real World when they find him way down yonder in the bottom of the Chattahoochie!
He believes that Alan Jackson will not fare well if he gets into a confrontation with him

Oh yeah! He just might run ya over with his Mercury!
He is still paranoid and thinks that Alan Jackson will try to harm him

I tell ya what, tell him to meet me somewhere!
He challenges Alan Jackson to meet him somewhere

Hey Hoss, meet him at Midnight In Montgomery!
He suggests that they should meet up in Montgomery at midnight

Wanted, my life back!
He desires his life back prior to his obsession with Alan Jackson

Who Says You Can't Have It All?
The assistant asks a rhetorical question suggesting that he cannot regain control of his life

Alan Jackson.
The song ends with a reference to the subject of the song, Alan Jackson.