Growing up in Malibu, California, she began learning the violin at the age of four and left regular school five years later with the goal of becoming a world-class violinist; she practiced eight or nine hours a day and read a wide range of literature. Progressing to writing her own music, she studied under various teachers and went to Indiana University, which she left over issues regarding the relationship between classical music and the appearance of the performer. Through her own independent label Traitor Records, Autumn debuted with her classical album On a Day: Music for Violin & Continuo, followed by the release in 2003 of her album Enchant.
She appeared in singer Courtney Love's backing band on her 2004 America's Sweetheart tour and returned to Europe. She released the 2006 album Opheliac with the German label Trisol Music Group. In 2007, she released Laced/Unlaced; the re-release of On a Day... appeared as Laced with songs on the electric violin as Unlaced. She later left Trisol to join New York-based The End Records in 2009 and release Opheliac in the United States, where previously it had only been available as an import. Currently she is on tour to promote her newest album Fight Like A Girl. She played the role of Painted Doll in Darren Lynn Bousman's 2012 film The Devil's Carnival.
Smirking Girl
Emilie Autumn Lyrics
Jump to: Overall Meaning ↴ Line by Line Meaning ↴
You'll often find a story without an ending
No 'Amen' to say it's over
All you have is a name you would rather forget
But it isn't over yet
Not when you've built your castle out of barricades
To guard against the fools you beat so long ago
Long before you even knew they were fools
And for such an independent soul
You sure wanted to believe in someone else
Can you blame them that you hate them?
Smirking girl, you ask too much
Who said anyone would show you the way?
Who said anyone would care what you'll do someday?
You're all alone here
You can't buy what isn't there
You're all alone here
You can't change what isn't fair
How obstinate you are
You can't forgive them
All they did was make you cry
On every day that passed you by
How wise they were to know you didn't like them
How foolish they should have to ask you why
The lyrics to Emilie Autumn's song "Smirking Girl" explores the idea of a person who has built walls around themselves to protect against past hurts and disappointments. The first verse alludes to a story without an ending, where the singer has a name they wish to forget. It is a melancholic reflection of the past, hinting that the person has experienced hurtful situations that have left their scars. However, the second verse reveals that the singer is not ready to give up on their defenses. They have built a fortress of barricades to guard against those who have hurt them, but now they consider those people to be fools. Interestingly, the lyrics indicate that the person had formed opinions of these people before they had even known them, which is a striking portrayal of preconceived notions that we can have.
The third verse dives deeper into the singer's emotions, showcasing their desperation for someone to believe in, even though they are an "independent soul." However, it seems the person has lost faith in humanity or a god, and they are left with no one to turn to. The chorus of the song depicts the person's stubbornness and unwillingness to forgive those who have wronged them. They are alone, and they are unable to change the unfairness of life. The last verse shows the internal struggle of the singer, who blames everyone else for not understanding them, while the truth may be that they do not understand themselves.
Line by Line Meaning
If you turn the pages of the past
Looking back at your past
You'll often find a story without an ending
You'll find parts of your life that don't make sense
No 'Amen' to say it's over
No conclusion to tell you that it's finished
All you have is a name you would rather forget
All you have is a memory you want to erase
But it isn't over yet
But the past still affects you
Not when you've built your castle out of barricades
You've built mental walls to avoid getting hurt again
To guard against the fools you beat so long ago
Protecting yourself from those who hurt you
Long before you even knew they were fools
Before you realized how wrong they were
But even longer since you saw a god in anyone
It's been a long time since you trusted someone
And for such an independent soul
Despite being independent
You sure wanted to believe in someone else
You still desired to trust someone
Can you blame them that you hate them?
Blaming others for your hate
Smirking girl, you ask too much
You expect too much from others
Who said anyone would show you the way?
No one promised to guide you
Who said anyone would care what you'll do someday?
No one promised to care for your future
You're all alone here
You're alone in this world
You can't buy what isn't there
You can't purchase something that doesn't exist
You can't change what isn't fair
You can't alter something that's unjust
How obstinate you are
You're stubborn
You can't forgive them
You can't forgive those who hurt you
All they did was make you cry
They caused you pain
On every day that passed you by
Every day affected you
How wise they were to know you didn't like them
They were smart to recognize that you didn't like them
How foolish they should have to ask you why
It's silly that they need to know why you dislike them
Contributed by Lillian M. Suggest a correction in the comments below.